Today has been a fun day. Well sorta.
I got up at 9 or so after going to bed at 2am. I couldnt sleep anymore, mom came in and the windows outside my room were open and letting the smell of morning/spring in and i couldnt just lie there as the beautiful day was leaving me. So i got up and talked to Lauren a bit about wedding stuff i think. cant remember really but it probably was.
Then I went and paid money for our apartment, and picked a building. It's nice. When we move in it'll have brand new carpet. We got 200 of the first months rent so on June 1 we only have to pay $400. Isnt that awesome! Also they will pay for up to $300 of our move. If we choose to use the people they have for us. since we dont have a truck we probably will. Just the big stuff though. Plus it's the 3rd floor so it will be tough carrying our beds and crap like that up there. all in all that was a big day for Aimee Hoyt. but fun.
I then went out to eat with my mom and some of her old friends. They arent as fun as they used to be. I dont think my mom had much fun either.
Then I had to go to the DMA all alone. I rode the train by myself and walked down there by myself. It was really empowering actually. I felt like a grown up. I stayed there for i think almost 4 hours. doing art appreciation work and junk. Not bad though it always makes me feel smart when i'm there.
I rode the train home and was exhausted but nervous if i closed my eyes someone would take my stuff. so i didnt.
So here I am. Loving life. I'm glad i'm such a happy person. I would hate to be in bad moods all the time. Life would suck.
Ok i'm sleepy and need to lay on the couch to make myself feel better.
oh me and lauren are getting along well these days. It's nice to have her back in my life. I just hope we keep it that way. :)
I got up at 9 or so after going to bed at 2am. I couldnt sleep anymore, mom came in and the windows outside my room were open and letting the smell of morning/spring in and i couldnt just lie there as the beautiful day was leaving me. So i got up and talked to Lauren a bit about wedding stuff i think. cant remember really but it probably was.
Then I went and paid money for our apartment, and picked a building. It's nice. When we move in it'll have brand new carpet. We got 200 of the first months rent so on June 1 we only have to pay $400. Isnt that awesome! Also they will pay for up to $300 of our move. If we choose to use the people they have for us. since we dont have a truck we probably will. Just the big stuff though. Plus it's the 3rd floor so it will be tough carrying our beds and crap like that up there. all in all that was a big day for Aimee Hoyt. but fun.
I then went out to eat with my mom and some of her old friends. They arent as fun as they used to be. I dont think my mom had much fun either.
Then I had to go to the DMA all alone. I rode the train by myself and walked down there by myself. It was really empowering actually. I felt like a grown up. I stayed there for i think almost 4 hours. doing art appreciation work and junk. Not bad though it always makes me feel smart when i'm there.
I rode the train home and was exhausted but nervous if i closed my eyes someone would take my stuff. so i didnt.
So here I am. Loving life. I'm glad i'm such a happy person. I would hate to be in bad moods all the time. Life would suck.
Ok i'm sleepy and need to lay on the couch to make myself feel better.
oh me and lauren are getting along well these days. It's nice to have her back in my life. I just hope we keep it that way. :)
i washed the stang last night so now i feel like i'm driving a brand new car. it's wonderful! and it runs better too (hahah)
today. i wasnt supposed to be able to come home until 745 or so BUT my spanish teacher wasnt doing so well, something was super wrong with her today, so she let us go an hour and 15 min early. so that rocked.
now i'm home and i ate a small oreo mcflurry and that was nice. it was my predesert cuz now i'm gonna go eat some lunch. :)
i need to find someone to buy my c-stone ticket.
i need to find a job.
i need a tan. i'm thinking about doing that instead of my tattoo.
here's the deal 40 bucks for tanning for a month or 40 bucks for a tattoo for a life time. who knows? give me your opinions please!
i'm off. i have to volunteer at 2 30 so i best be jettin. haha
today. i wasnt supposed to be able to come home until 745 or so BUT my spanish teacher wasnt doing so well, something was super wrong with her today, so she let us go an hour and 15 min early. so that rocked.
now i'm home and i ate a small oreo mcflurry and that was nice. it was my predesert cuz now i'm gonna go eat some lunch. :)
i need to find someone to buy my c-stone ticket.
i need to find a job.
i need a tan. i'm thinking about doing that instead of my tattoo.
here's the deal 40 bucks for tanning for a month or 40 bucks for a tattoo for a life time. who knows? give me your opinions please!
i'm off. i have to volunteer at 2 30 so i best be jettin. haha
tomorrow is the last day of MARCH! i cant believe it. it's gone by so quickly. April 1 I get to go pay 50 bucks and sign some papers for the apartment. and then it's official!
now we just need jobs. Its really getting down to the wire. I just cant decide where i want to work and what hours. tough decisions.
it's a beautiful day. 65 degrees. sun is shining. my parents are outside working on the yard. I think i'm gonna open the window and start this silly paper. I hope I do as well as the last ones. It would stink to get an A on 2 papers and then not do as well on the next. Larry might think i'm not as smart as he once thought. :)
My others classes are lacking. It makes me sad that I have no motivation to go to them. but i just hate them. art appreciation and spanish being 2 of them. YUCK!
so i'm off. maybe i'll write later.
now we just need jobs. Its really getting down to the wire. I just cant decide where i want to work and what hours. tough decisions.
it's a beautiful day. 65 degrees. sun is shining. my parents are outside working on the yard. I think i'm gonna open the window and start this silly paper. I hope I do as well as the last ones. It would stink to get an A on 2 papers and then not do as well on the next. Larry might think i'm not as smart as he once thought. :)
My others classes are lacking. It makes me sad that I have no motivation to go to them. but i just hate them. art appreciation and spanish being 2 of them. YUCK!
so i'm off. maybe i'll write later.
oh i didnt add one thing. this boy see previous post said tonight "I am an asshole"
yes folks he said it himself. i know i know it's hard to believe i almost didnt believe it myself. i had to blink a couple times, pinch my cheeks. but to my amazement it was still there!!
ok it isnt nice but the things he did to me werent either. it's well deserved. (i think)
it's late. i'm tired. i'm gonna sleep so very well.
yes folks he said it himself. i know i know it's hard to believe i almost didnt believe it myself. i had to blink a couple times, pinch my cheeks. but to my amazement it was still there!!
ok it isnt nice but the things he did to me werent either. it's well deserved. (i think)
it's late. i'm tired. i'm gonna sleep so very well.
wow!
i found some stuff out tonight that just astounded me. floored me to say the least.
we will try to keep this as anonymous as possible.
long story short i found out a guy that i was "friends" with just messes around with girls to have sex with them and then hurt them. he said that. in his own words!! i couldnt believe it. then he says he doesnt care and it isnt immature. WHOA!! something in wrong in the ticker. seriously wrong.
i just dont have words for it. i said to leia "this is me: :O times infinity!!"
WHOA!!
if you want to learn more or even read the conversation just ask me cuz i would love to show you!
ok on to funny times in my life......
funny times more often than not involve me and dee dee laughin it up on the computer. heres a glimpse because i feel like everyone should have the privlage to know about us and our stupidity....
DeeDee1784: well then we wont go
AIMIZZLE: ahahhaah
DeeDee1784: haha your funny
AIMIZZLE: shut up! stop being a girl
AIMIZZLE: that was such a girl thing to say!
DeeDee1784: well then lets go then
DeeDee1784: SHUT UP!!!!
AIMIZZLE: "well then we wont go" :crosses arms across chest and lets out a "humph":
AIMIZZLE: hahaha you did that didnt you?!??!
DeeDee1784: no no no no no
DeeDee1784: i didnt
ok some more you say. alrighty. well really this is just me being super stupid.
AIMIZZLE: NIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCEEEEEE. like ice
AIMIZZLE: when you have burning lice
AIMIZZLE: and all you want to do is play with some dice
AIMIZZLE: it's that nice
DeeDee1784: ohhhh man
DeeDee1784: your a dork
AIMIZZLE: that was smooth like lard
AIMIZZLE: ohhhhhhh
DeeDee1784: hahahaha
AIMIZZLE: haha that was gross like GROSS!
ok this was a little sick of me, but it was what i thought umm ok here goes.
AIMIZZLE: AIMIZZLE: well we shall talk more about it saturday when we are all in eachother's arms. (well i didnt really mean to make it sound like a huge orgy but yeah)
AIMIZZLE: i think that was a little gross
this has turned out to be super long only by cutting and pasting. but wait you sweet little person i have more! one last funny thing to say.
the boy that was referred to earlier is now being called "the poster child for low self-esteem." this comment was made by an unknown source. (oh i cant lie. I SAID IT!!!)
it's the truth and the truth must be set free!
so the war goes on and so do I.
I love my life right this very moment more than i did 2 hours ago only because I learned a lot tonight about how some (i will say) boys (because we all know hes NOT a man) are really scummy.
michael tried to tell me, but oh no i wouldnt listen. well michael, i hear ya loud and clear now!
speaking of him. i ate saltine crackers today with green 7up (not the same as red mountain dew i know but still) and i thought of him and smiled. except i didnt eat the whole package +2. i only had half.
ok i'm done for tonight.
i love you all more each day! (especially dee dee and LEIA MARIE COMPTON!!) YOU ARE THE WOMAN!!!! i applaud you.
i found some stuff out tonight that just astounded me. floored me to say the least.
we will try to keep this as anonymous as possible.
long story short i found out a guy that i was "friends" with just messes around with girls to have sex with them and then hurt them. he said that. in his own words!! i couldnt believe it. then he says he doesnt care and it isnt immature. WHOA!! something in wrong in the ticker. seriously wrong.
i just dont have words for it. i said to leia "this is me: :O times infinity!!"
WHOA!!
if you want to learn more or even read the conversation just ask me cuz i would love to show you!
ok on to funny times in my life......
funny times more often than not involve me and dee dee laughin it up on the computer. heres a glimpse because i feel like everyone should have the privlage to know about us and our stupidity....
DeeDee1784: well then we wont go
AIMIZZLE: ahahhaah
DeeDee1784: haha your funny
AIMIZZLE: shut up! stop being a girl
AIMIZZLE: that was such a girl thing to say!
DeeDee1784: well then lets go then
DeeDee1784: SHUT UP!!!!
AIMIZZLE: "well then we wont go" :crosses arms across chest and lets out a "humph":
AIMIZZLE: hahaha you did that didnt you?!??!
DeeDee1784: no no no no no
DeeDee1784: i didnt
ok some more you say. alrighty. well really this is just me being super stupid.
AIMIZZLE: NIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCEEEEEE. like ice
AIMIZZLE: when you have burning lice
AIMIZZLE: and all you want to do is play with some dice
AIMIZZLE: it's that nice
DeeDee1784: ohhhh man
DeeDee1784: your a dork
AIMIZZLE: that was smooth like lard
AIMIZZLE: ohhhhhhh
DeeDee1784: hahahaha
AIMIZZLE: haha that was gross like GROSS!
ok this was a little sick of me, but it was what i thought umm ok here goes.
AIMIZZLE: AIMIZZLE: well we shall talk more about it saturday when we are all in eachother's arms. (well i didnt really mean to make it sound like a huge orgy but yeah)
AIMIZZLE: i think that was a little gross
this has turned out to be super long only by cutting and pasting. but wait you sweet little person i have more! one last funny thing to say.
the boy that was referred to earlier is now being called "the poster child for low self-esteem." this comment was made by an unknown source. (oh i cant lie. I SAID IT!!!)
it's the truth and the truth must be set free!
so the war goes on and so do I.
I love my life right this very moment more than i did 2 hours ago only because I learned a lot tonight about how some (i will say) boys (because we all know hes NOT a man) are really scummy.
michael tried to tell me, but oh no i wouldnt listen. well michael, i hear ya loud and clear now!
speaking of him. i ate saltine crackers today with green 7up (not the same as red mountain dew i know but still) and i thought of him and smiled. except i didnt eat the whole package +2. i only had half.
ok i'm done for tonight.
i love you all more each day! (especially dee dee and LEIA MARIE COMPTON!!) YOU ARE THE WOMAN!!!! i applaud you.
sometimes i wonder if people realize there are other people around.
like when you are in the school library and the people across from you are talking so that anyone within 20 ft of them could hear every word they say.
or when you are trying to read something that is so powerful and you want the full affect but someone next to you is laughing about something they are reading.
HEY!!! it's the library!! try to be respectful!!!
I think i might be a little too emotional these days. on the edge i guess.
I long to be out of this school and on green grass reading a book that really makes you think.
It's so beautiful outside but i'm stuck here.
I long to have no assignments due and be able to work and get off and go "home", unlock my own door and walk in. Sit on my OWN couch turn on my t.v. and relax. Soon.
but i think i''m learning life is full of longings. you will never stop wanting to be somewhere else with someone different. So why do i keep thinking someday i'll be where i want and doing what i love.
maybe it'll happen but i dont think it's anytime soon. which is kind of dissappointing, but hopeful at the same time. Life is full of setting goals and reaching those goals. I guess being happy with where you are is a goal that I have sent. Being successful, having a family, and a good job are all part of that goal.
So being here at CCCC is, i guess, a small step to reaching that goal.
i'm feeling more inspired now after writing all this out. It's nice to have this place to come and write out all that you are thinking and then realize life isnt as hopeless as you thought 5 min. ago.
I have Spanish in 20 min. I'm not sure i'll go though. It's 61 degrees outside and sunny. How could anyone enjoy this place when outside is so much more inviting. We'll see.
like when you are in the school library and the people across from you are talking so that anyone within 20 ft of them could hear every word they say.
or when you are trying to read something that is so powerful and you want the full affect but someone next to you is laughing about something they are reading.
HEY!!! it's the library!! try to be respectful!!!
I think i might be a little too emotional these days. on the edge i guess.
I long to be out of this school and on green grass reading a book that really makes you think.
It's so beautiful outside but i'm stuck here.
I long to have no assignments due and be able to work and get off and go "home", unlock my own door and walk in. Sit on my OWN couch turn on my t.v. and relax. Soon.
but i think i''m learning life is full of longings. you will never stop wanting to be somewhere else with someone different. So why do i keep thinking someday i'll be where i want and doing what i love.
maybe it'll happen but i dont think it's anytime soon. which is kind of dissappointing, but hopeful at the same time. Life is full of setting goals and reaching those goals. I guess being happy with where you are is a goal that I have sent. Being successful, having a family, and a good job are all part of that goal.
So being here at CCCC is, i guess, a small step to reaching that goal.
i'm feeling more inspired now after writing all this out. It's nice to have this place to come and write out all that you are thinking and then realize life isnt as hopeless as you thought 5 min. ago.
I have Spanish in 20 min. I'm not sure i'll go though. It's 61 degrees outside and sunny. How could anyone enjoy this place when outside is so much more inviting. We'll see.
sometimes i think aimee's life="same shit different day"
(sorry for the bad word)
today i got in the car and sat back and my seat went back super far. so the jerks that broke into my car must have broken my seat as well. Which really sucks because now i'm thugin it hard core! I hope people dont think i'm tryin to look cool or something. really it just super uncomfortable to drive and i can hardly see over the stearing wheel. It's getting fixed sometime next week though.
so that's all for now. i'll have something smart to say tonight.
i'm going to Thomas' house now. Yeah i'm feeling ok. i just kinda miss him. we've been getting along well lately.
(sorry for the bad word)
today i got in the car and sat back and my seat went back super far. so the jerks that broke into my car must have broken my seat as well. Which really sucks because now i'm thugin it hard core! I hope people dont think i'm tryin to look cool or something. really it just super uncomfortable to drive and i can hardly see over the stearing wheel. It's getting fixed sometime next week though.
so that's all for now. i'll have something smart to say tonight.
i'm going to Thomas' house now. Yeah i'm feeling ok. i just kinda miss him. we've been getting along well lately.
i went out to my car this morning and my window was broken out. I almost puked. Then I realized people dont just break windows out for fun, they took something. They took my cds and my cd player. I was so sick. I cried and cried and cried.
My dad always told me not to leave my cd's in there, but of course being the know it all 19 year old i never ever listened. So here I am standing in broken glass wishing i would have taken my cd's in the night before.
But what are you gonna do.
Life goes on. Life isnt all about material things. So i dont have cds. who cares!
so today i learned a big lesson in life. Not everyone is as honest and caring as me. and dont leave your crap in your car, cuz it WILL get taken.
My dad always told me not to leave my cd's in there, but of course being the know it all 19 year old i never ever listened. So here I am standing in broken glass wishing i would have taken my cd's in the night before.
But what are you gonna do.
Life goes on. Life isnt all about material things. So i dont have cds. who cares!
so today i learned a big lesson in life. Not everyone is as honest and caring as me. and dont leave your crap in your car, cuz it WILL get taken.
This is from me and dee dee's blog.....
"I boycotted the Acedamy Awards tonight. I am telling you this because i have never boycotted anything in my life, but tonight i felt strongly that any red blooded American that Loves George Bush as much as I should not watch that TRASH!!! I knew they would talk bad about the war and if you ask me they shouldnt be able to do what they do if they dont love America and what America stands for! I dont care who you are if you are so selfish to think that we shouldnt help an oppressed group of people where thousands die every day because their government hates them then you can get the hell out of my country!!
I'm sad that American people have to die, but to me it's worth it because I want my children to live in a world where they dont have to see their friends go off to war or live in fear that one day they will turn on the television and see that someone bombed buildings because they hated Americans."
I'm gonna make a button that says "WAR IN IRAQ" for all those people at school that have buttons that say "no war in iraq"
i didnt even mention the people that think this war is only a war about oil. one word...MORONS!! do some research before you go on the news and make such an unintelligent comment. I have never heard Bush or anyone else say anything about oil or our need for it. and why are people saying this is all Bush's fault? Did he bomb the world trade center? Did he kill his own people? NO!!!!! He's a wonderful man and he's doing what's best for the world and America. Why cant people see that? Could Clinton or Gore do any better? I doubt. I dont think Clinton did anything good in office except leave!
ok i'm gonna get off my soap box. sorry for that. i dont share my opinion often but it had to be said.
"I boycotted the Acedamy Awards tonight. I am telling you this because i have never boycotted anything in my life, but tonight i felt strongly that any red blooded American that Loves George Bush as much as I should not watch that TRASH!!! I knew they would talk bad about the war and if you ask me they shouldnt be able to do what they do if they dont love America and what America stands for! I dont care who you are if you are so selfish to think that we shouldnt help an oppressed group of people where thousands die every day because their government hates them then you can get the hell out of my country!!
I'm sad that American people have to die, but to me it's worth it because I want my children to live in a world where they dont have to see their friends go off to war or live in fear that one day they will turn on the television and see that someone bombed buildings because they hated Americans."
I'm gonna make a button that says "WAR IN IRAQ" for all those people at school that have buttons that say "no war in iraq"
i didnt even mention the people that think this war is only a war about oil. one word...MORONS!! do some research before you go on the news and make such an unintelligent comment. I have never heard Bush or anyone else say anything about oil or our need for it. and why are people saying this is all Bush's fault? Did he bomb the world trade center? Did he kill his own people? NO!!!!! He's a wonderful man and he's doing what's best for the world and America. Why cant people see that? Could Clinton or Gore do any better? I doubt. I dont think Clinton did anything good in office except leave!
ok i'm gonna get off my soap box. sorry for that. i dont share my opinion often but it had to be said.
so today was a rough day for Americans. People we captured and killed and abused in ways i'm sure we dont want to know. I know the media is making it out better than it really is. Everytime i hear of someone dying i pray it isnt Yvonne, Josh or Steve. but still in the back of my mind i wonder how long this is going to go on and if they will even come home, the more i think about it the more i dont think they will make it home. Which makes me very sad because i'm here and living the life that a 19 year old should and they are they fighting for me when i sit here refusing to think about it because i dont want it to mess up my life and what i have. how selfish am i? We can only have hope it will be short and few people (even Iraqi's) will die. But not matter what i will be behind America and Bush.
ok on to better news.....
Me and Dee Dee found an apartment and we are moving in June 1st. A week from tuesday i have to turn in some money to hold our apartment and all that. Then a couple days before we move in we sign the lease. 13 months!! it should be super fun.
It's too bad dee dee's mom is such a jerk about it all. She really needs to realize what a good daughter she has, and how lucky she is to have her.
I dont really feel like typing anymore right now. my hands are tired and I want to get out of this house. so i'll type more later.
ok on to better news.....
Me and Dee Dee found an apartment and we are moving in June 1st. A week from tuesday i have to turn in some money to hold our apartment and all that. Then a couple days before we move in we sign the lease. 13 months!! it should be super fun.
It's too bad dee dee's mom is such a jerk about it all. She really needs to realize what a good daughter she has, and how lucky she is to have her.
I dont really feel like typing anymore right now. my hands are tired and I want to get out of this house. so i'll type more later.
it's official.
I thought i would blog that for history sake. On this 19th day of March 2003, George W. Bush declared war on Iraq.
Ok now I have made it official in my blog.
i'm scared.
i'm going to write leon and helena isbell and thank you note for raising their kids so well that they would want to fight for me and my country.
I think it will be much appreiciated.
In fact if you know anyone who has gone over seas I encourage you to write their parents a small note telling them how much you love them. no one knows the pain they are going through tonight.
I thought i would blog that for history sake. On this 19th day of March 2003, George W. Bush declared war on Iraq.
Ok now I have made it official in my blog.
i'm scared.
i'm going to write leon and helena isbell and thank you note for raising their kids so well that they would want to fight for me and my country.
I think it will be much appreiciated.
In fact if you know anyone who has gone over seas I encourage you to write their parents a small note telling them how much you love them. no one knows the pain they are going through tonight.
i'm home. its nice to be here.
except i have class now and i'm not sure how much i enjoy that. i dont think i enjoy it at all.
business meeting with dee dee tonight. we are moving into our unknown apartment on June 1st, or around there. so thursday and friday will be filled with looking for a good, non-ghetto place. we'll see what we can come up with that will fit into our budget. ($700)
demario laughed when i told him, because we all know you cant find a nice 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom apt. for that. but we are cute so maybe we'll get a good deal. hahaha
it's late. i'm sleepy, and i've been longing for my bed for 10 days!!
except i have class now and i'm not sure how much i enjoy that. i dont think i enjoy it at all.
business meeting with dee dee tonight. we are moving into our unknown apartment on June 1st, or around there. so thursday and friday will be filled with looking for a good, non-ghetto place. we'll see what we can come up with that will fit into our budget. ($700)
demario laughed when i told him, because we all know you cant find a nice 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom apt. for that. but we are cute so maybe we'll get a good deal. hahaha
it's late. i'm sleepy, and i've been longing for my bed for 10 days!!
well i went to the meetings and stuff. i left thursday around 2 30 to head back to Moline. my trip was supposed to be until friday afternoon. I saw all i needed to see. so the conclusion i have come to is....
I'm not going. I have surprised myself, and i just cant do it. It's so far from home and there are 6 girls in one dorm room. I just couldnt handle that. I will go when i'm a junior and live off campus. So my plans for the next year are to go to CCCC for one more semester and then maybe go to UTD to get some of my social work classes out of the way. all the while moving out and living on my own with dee dee. I think it'll be really good for me. i will be able to learn responsibilty while still having the comfort of my parents close by.
some dont think this is such a good idea, but i have thought long and hard about it and feel it is gonna be great!
I'm still in Moline and really really ready to come home. only 2 more days. that's good. i dont think i can handle the smoke anymore.
tonight HRC is playing in Chicago and I didnt get to see them :( i'm pretty sad about that. oh, i didnt even get to see any of Chicago because we were in such a hurry while we were in Palos Heights. I was so close and didnt get to see any of it. DANG IT!! my cousin said that next time i come up she'll take me. GOOD!! i was pretty sad that i went to "chicago" and didnt even get to see the city.
so spring break is pretty much over and i have had a wonderful time. I dont think i'm really ready to go back to class though. but we are almost done with the semester belive it or not! i'm glad about that. i need a break. i need to find a good job too.
so there is good news but it is not to be said on here because some people that i dont want to know read this. so...if you want to know the "news" ask me! HA!!
michael holland: if you read this please email me and tell me how life is. i read that you are going to philly for spring break. how'd that happen? sounds like you'll have a blast!
that's all for now.
I'm not going. I have surprised myself, and i just cant do it. It's so far from home and there are 6 girls in one dorm room. I just couldnt handle that. I will go when i'm a junior and live off campus. So my plans for the next year are to go to CCCC for one more semester and then maybe go to UTD to get some of my social work classes out of the way. all the while moving out and living on my own with dee dee. I think it'll be really good for me. i will be able to learn responsibilty while still having the comfort of my parents close by.
some dont think this is such a good idea, but i have thought long and hard about it and feel it is gonna be great!
I'm still in Moline and really really ready to come home. only 2 more days. that's good. i dont think i can handle the smoke anymore.
tonight HRC is playing in Chicago and I didnt get to see them :( i'm pretty sad about that. oh, i didnt even get to see any of Chicago because we were in such a hurry while we were in Palos Heights. I was so close and didnt get to see any of it. DANG IT!! my cousin said that next time i come up she'll take me. GOOD!! i was pretty sad that i went to "chicago" and didnt even get to see the city.
so spring break is pretty much over and i have had a wonderful time. I dont think i'm really ready to go back to class though. but we are almost done with the semester belive it or not! i'm glad about that. i need a break. i need to find a good job too.
so there is good news but it is not to be said on here because some people that i dont want to know read this. so...if you want to know the "news" ask me! HA!!
michael holland: if you read this please email me and tell me how life is. i read that you are going to philly for spring break. how'd that happen? sounds like you'll have a blast!
that's all for now.
i'm here. i'm happy. not sure if i'll come in the fall but right now it's 70/30 for coming and the percentage is climbing.
i got here around 5 30 and met the girls i'm staying with. i'm not too impressed by them. i think they are being fake. but now that i'm in the computer lab with people that dont know i'm visiting i am begining to like it better. there are some super cute boys. none really my type but who knows.
these kids have the coolest accents too. I know i'm gonna catch on quick. dee dee and i talked on the phone and i said "mcdonalds" with an accent and she laughed at me.
i've noticed already.
ok i'm done. i'll write tomorrow, after all my meetings and junk.
i got here around 5 30 and met the girls i'm staying with. i'm not too impressed by them. i think they are being fake. but now that i'm in the computer lab with people that dont know i'm visiting i am begining to like it better. there are some super cute boys. none really my type but who knows.
these kids have the coolest accents too. I know i'm gonna catch on quick. dee dee and i talked on the phone and i said "mcdonalds" with an accent and she laughed at me.
i've noticed already.
ok i'm done. i'll write tomorrow, after all my meetings and junk.
the biggest decision of my life is only 3 days away. i'm so nervous i could puke. God is in control here for sure!
dee dee keeps trying to talk me out of. which is very tempting but i cant listen till i have seen the school. i know i'll fall in love with it.
i wish going to college was easier. but it's not and GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!!
and i'm so happy about that.
ok i'm going to be praying like a mother for the next 3 days. pray with me please!!!
dee dee keeps trying to talk me out of. which is very tempting but i cant listen till i have seen the school. i know i'll fall in love with it.
i wish going to college was easier. but it's not and GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!!
and i'm so happy about that.
ok i'm going to be praying like a mother for the next 3 days. pray with me please!!!
so i got to moline illinios on saturday. it's been nice,except that when i hang out with my mom's family i always end up smelling like smoke after. it's so gross i want to puke. other than that it's been pretty fun.
i've hung out with my cousin ashley a whole lot. she's super cool. we have fun together. her boyfriend ted is cool too.
i dont really have much to say right now. except that it's really cold here. Tomorrow the high is in the 40's. that will be nice because i'm sick of it being in the 20's and crap.
ok that's all.
only 2 more days till Palos Heights. i'm ready to get this over with. i mean seeing about the school and meeting people for the first time. i'm having a blast here.
i've hung out with my cousin ashley a whole lot. she's super cool. we have fun together. her boyfriend ted is cool too.
i dont really have much to say right now. except that it's really cold here. Tomorrow the high is in the 40's. that will be nice because i'm sick of it being in the 20's and crap.
ok that's all.
only 2 more days till Palos Heights. i'm ready to get this over with. i mean seeing about the school and meeting people for the first time. i'm having a blast here.
what a beautiful day it is!! so warm an it's just right to wear flip flops!! my favorite!!
I got a hair cut today. i love it! it's short.com! i mean even shorter than it was. that makes me a happy person.
i have a test in 30 min that i'm not prepared for. i'm not nervous though. I think i can get by and do well. who knows though. tomorrow is friday. that means that dee dee is coming home and we are gonna have tons of fun at IHOP! after the "party" at the door though. Man so much to look foward to in my life these days.
let's list them how bout:
1. Dee Dee and the laughin it up that will be goin on friday @ ihop
2. the plane ride (that's excitement in its self)
3. Moline, IL
4. Palos Heights, IL
5. Chicago, IL
6. MAAATTTT!! (said in strongbad's voice)
7. me and na on friday! we laugh it up too!
8. James Taylor in May. WHAT WHAT!
9. a whole week with deeder beeder
10. C-stone to the max!
11. LIFE!!!!
that's right! tons and tons of awesome wonderful things going on in this here life. I'm livin it up like a 19 year old should.
i've been wearing the hoop in my nose the past couple of days and it makes me laugh because when i wear it people wont even look at me. It's like i'm this bad person because i have a hoop in my nose. WEIRD!
but... i have been approached by 2 guys wanting me to take some stupid survey and buy magazines while wearing the hoop. maybe a corollation (sp?) maybe not. no one will know. haha both were pretty perverted though and said mulitple things about sex and drinking. umm HELLO dont talk to a girl like that FOOL!
ok i'm done here. i need to brush the teeth and go to class. art apprectiation. ICK!
i think i would hate art if it werent for michael j. holland (who i'm sending a package TODAY!)
I got a hair cut today. i love it! it's short.com! i mean even shorter than it was. that makes me a happy person.
i have a test in 30 min that i'm not prepared for. i'm not nervous though. I think i can get by and do well. who knows though. tomorrow is friday. that means that dee dee is coming home and we are gonna have tons of fun at IHOP! after the "party" at the door though. Man so much to look foward to in my life these days.
let's list them how bout:
1. Dee Dee and the laughin it up that will be goin on friday @ ihop
2. the plane ride (that's excitement in its self)
3. Moline, IL
4. Palos Heights, IL
5. Chicago, IL
6. MAAATTTT!! (said in strongbad's voice)
7. me and na on friday! we laugh it up too!
8. James Taylor in May. WHAT WHAT!
9. a whole week with deeder beeder
10. C-stone to the max!
11. LIFE!!!!
that's right! tons and tons of awesome wonderful things going on in this here life. I'm livin it up like a 19 year old should.
i've been wearing the hoop in my nose the past couple of days and it makes me laugh because when i wear it people wont even look at me. It's like i'm this bad person because i have a hoop in my nose. WEIRD!
but... i have been approached by 2 guys wanting me to take some stupid survey and buy magazines while wearing the hoop. maybe a corollation (sp?) maybe not. no one will know. haha both were pretty perverted though and said mulitple things about sex and drinking. umm HELLO dont talk to a girl like that FOOL!
ok i'm done here. i need to brush the teeth and go to class. art apprectiation. ICK!
i think i would hate art if it werent for michael j. holland (who i'm sending a package TODAY!)
tonght made me the happiest girl on the planet!!!
maybe i can show you why. hold please....
nope i cant. i'll have them on some website soon. or you can ask me to see them. :)
so tonight i also lost hope in the law enforcment as a whole. you say "but aimee that's kinda lame there are plenty of good nice police men out there" and i say...
yes but I viewed two cities tonight do something which made me think that the law to them is really a double standard. so here's what happened. Me and Naomi were at the west end and there were tons of cops around because it's fat tuesday (who knew? not us) so we are sitting waiting for the train. Well the "transit" police are all around giving tickets to everyone that is walking across the tracks instead of at the crosswalk. so we are sitting there for a while, and like 3 or 4 cops just walk across the tracks. you say "at the crosswalk i hope" i say "NO!! they sure didnt!!" i wanted to ask them if it was ok for them to walk across because maybe they had a force field i couldnt see or something. or maybe a protective shield that maybe beeped when a train was coming or something. but i think all that stuff is make believe, at least that's what my mom told me. so me and naomi came to the conclusion that it is a double standard between "real" people and the "transit" police.
oh we also came to the conclusion that they really are police soley on the fact that they carry a gun. AWESOME!
ok the other city that made me lose all hope in the law is PLANO!! i was driving home and there were 2 cops in front of me. so one of them switches lanes (he used his signal) then the other one changes lanes. but he didnt use his signal. my mouth dropped!! so i gave him the benefit of the doubt (NEVER GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT!) but guess what he did agian?! you switched lanes and yet again he didnt use his signal. Is this another double standard? i think so!! JERKS!!
so now i dont feel bad if i dont completely stop at the stop sign in my neighborhood, or go 7 over the speed limit.
screw them!! they do it too!! HA! CHUMPS!!
ok i'm done.
i'm so happy I feel like jumping. hahaha
"and yeah if only it was Saturday, Saturday...
things would be better in every way, every way...
and i would be OK." -The Rocket Summer
that was for Na. i'll give you back the cd friday. sorry I drove off with it. :(
maybe i can show you why. hold please....
nope i cant. i'll have them on some website soon. or you can ask me to see them. :)
so tonight i also lost hope in the law enforcment as a whole. you say "but aimee that's kinda lame there are plenty of good nice police men out there" and i say...
yes but I viewed two cities tonight do something which made me think that the law to them is really a double standard. so here's what happened. Me and Naomi were at the west end and there were tons of cops around because it's fat tuesday (who knew? not us) so we are sitting waiting for the train. Well the "transit" police are all around giving tickets to everyone that is walking across the tracks instead of at the crosswalk. so we are sitting there for a while, and like 3 or 4 cops just walk across the tracks. you say "at the crosswalk i hope" i say "NO!! they sure didnt!!" i wanted to ask them if it was ok for them to walk across because maybe they had a force field i couldnt see or something. or maybe a protective shield that maybe beeped when a train was coming or something. but i think all that stuff is make believe, at least that's what my mom told me. so me and naomi came to the conclusion that it is a double standard between "real" people and the "transit" police.
oh we also came to the conclusion that they really are police soley on the fact that they carry a gun. AWESOME!
ok the other city that made me lose all hope in the law is PLANO!! i was driving home and there were 2 cops in front of me. so one of them switches lanes (he used his signal) then the other one changes lanes. but he didnt use his signal. my mouth dropped!! so i gave him the benefit of the doubt (NEVER GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT!) but guess what he did agian?! you switched lanes and yet again he didnt use his signal. Is this another double standard? i think so!! JERKS!!
so now i dont feel bad if i dont completely stop at the stop sign in my neighborhood, or go 7 over the speed limit.
screw them!! they do it too!! HA! CHUMPS!!
ok i'm done.
i'm so happy I feel like jumping. hahaha
"and yeah if only it was Saturday, Saturday...
things would be better in every way, every way...
and i would be OK." -The Rocket Summer
that was for Na. i'll give you back the cd friday. sorry I drove off with it. :(
I thought I would just write a few words here today. nothing really profound to say (if i ever say anything prfound).
4 days till IL. me and mom decided that she is going to drop me off wednesday, leave thursday morning, and pick me up friday afternoon. This makes me nervous and super excited all at the same time.
ok well change of plans. as i was typing this the girl from Trinity called me and said it would be better for my mom to stay so that she can talk to financial aid. which makes complete sense. so here we are. and she gave me the number for the girl i'm staying with so i can call her when i get there. WOW I'm so excited.
I talked to my cousin last night. She got some days off so we can party like is 2999! man i crack myself up.
ok i dont really have anything more to say.
time for school. then to na's to party like its 2003!
some thoughts that run though my head sometimes:
wow the freezer sure is empty
dang i wish i could take my room everywhere with me
it's a beatiful day. roll down the windows. (today is that day)
ok no more for now.
life is beautiful!
4 days till IL. me and mom decided that she is going to drop me off wednesday, leave thursday morning, and pick me up friday afternoon. This makes me nervous and super excited all at the same time.
ok well change of plans. as i was typing this the girl from Trinity called me and said it would be better for my mom to stay so that she can talk to financial aid. which makes complete sense. so here we are. and she gave me the number for the girl i'm staying with so i can call her when i get there. WOW I'm so excited.
I talked to my cousin last night. She got some days off so we can party like is 2999! man i crack myself up.
ok i dont really have anything more to say.
time for school. then to na's to party like its 2003!
some thoughts that run though my head sometimes:
wow the freezer sure is empty
dang i wish i could take my room everywhere with me
it's a beatiful day. roll down the windows. (today is that day)
ok no more for now.
life is beautiful!
You know that place you get to when you are worshipping the creator? You know how it's so safe and secure like you are floating to an unknown place but not afraid of where it will take you?
I need that. I want to feel that again.
I'm so afraid of what life has to offer me.
I feel like sometimes I have so much drive i could take over the world. then other days i just want to be a stay at home mom and love my family (not that there is anything wrong with that).
Sometimes I think that i wish my life away. I countdown the days to events in my life, but then when they come i'm just dissappointed and annoyed that i wished and hoped so hard. but then i stay up late because i'm afraid of what the next day has for me. I'm scared i might fail myself in someway. I'm scared something horific will happen in my life and i wont be ready for it. I'm scared my dreams wont come true.
It's hard coming to realiazations about yourself that you've known all along but refused to speak of because you were afraid someone else had noticed them. It's better to know yourself and not know that someone else sees that too. I wonder what i could have done to become the person i want to be now at this moment in my life. Could I have chosen different people to surround myself? Could I have made better choices? Or is this what God had for me at this moment? I'm not sure. I like to think that i have been in God's will since i have known him. but i know that's not true. I'm not even sure i'm in God's will right this minute. but doubting yourself never made anyone move from the spot they are in.
When did my life become so crazy? how did i let all these things in to my world? I wish i knew. Id go back and shut the door on them. I'd shut the door on fear. and worry.
I laugh to cover my worrys and fears and doubt. To cover what really goes on in my head. I've learned to do that so that people dont get to see me for me. I've learned not to trust people for who they are.
Where did this fear come from? How do i get it out of me? I wish i had all the answers.
I find myself staying up till all hours of the night because i'm hoping the next day wont come. But when it does i'm so happy because i get to live another day.
What a blessing that is. Living your life in a nice neighborhood, in America. Eating 3 meals a day.
how blessed my life is. so why am i scared?
i'm not sure. I think it might be because I dont trust God enough with my life. If i let him have totaly control over my life and the choices i make I would laugh because i'm happy.
It's time for bed. Tomorrow has another day for me to live this beautiful life.
goodnight.
michael-your entry changed my life.
I need that. I want to feel that again.
I'm so afraid of what life has to offer me.
I feel like sometimes I have so much drive i could take over the world. then other days i just want to be a stay at home mom and love my family (not that there is anything wrong with that).
Sometimes I think that i wish my life away. I countdown the days to events in my life, but then when they come i'm just dissappointed and annoyed that i wished and hoped so hard. but then i stay up late because i'm afraid of what the next day has for me. I'm scared i might fail myself in someway. I'm scared something horific will happen in my life and i wont be ready for it. I'm scared my dreams wont come true.
It's hard coming to realiazations about yourself that you've known all along but refused to speak of because you were afraid someone else had noticed them. It's better to know yourself and not know that someone else sees that too. I wonder what i could have done to become the person i want to be now at this moment in my life. Could I have chosen different people to surround myself? Could I have made better choices? Or is this what God had for me at this moment? I'm not sure. I like to think that i have been in God's will since i have known him. but i know that's not true. I'm not even sure i'm in God's will right this minute. but doubting yourself never made anyone move from the spot they are in.
When did my life become so crazy? how did i let all these things in to my world? I wish i knew. Id go back and shut the door on them. I'd shut the door on fear. and worry.
I laugh to cover my worrys and fears and doubt. To cover what really goes on in my head. I've learned to do that so that people dont get to see me for me. I've learned not to trust people for who they are.
Where did this fear come from? How do i get it out of me? I wish i had all the answers.
I find myself staying up till all hours of the night because i'm hoping the next day wont come. But when it does i'm so happy because i get to live another day.
What a blessing that is. Living your life in a nice neighborhood, in America. Eating 3 meals a day.
how blessed my life is. so why am i scared?
i'm not sure. I think it might be because I dont trust God enough with my life. If i let him have totaly control over my life and the choices i make I would laugh because i'm happy.
It's time for bed. Tomorrow has another day for me to live this beautiful life.
goodnight.
michael-your entry changed my life.
time for saturday:
1. late to sleep early to rise. I got up at 7 30 to babysit.
2. The kids were better.
3. Birthday parties to attend (the kids i mean). Chick-fil-A, bath and body works, Petco (it's where the pets go).
4. She got home at 5 30. NICE!!
5. Home for a bit. It was nice to stop in and chill for a bit.
6. Na's play!!!! it was great!! from 7 30-10 30 though. I fell asleep twice. Not while she was on stage though. of course!
7. the door. I got crap for being so late. I didnt work at all!! I didnt even help clean up!!! It felt good to let someone else take charge for once.
8. Metro Diner, yet again. Ryan says you are cool if you go 2 nights in a row, and we all know i'll do anything to be COOL!!
9. Olivia went which made it that much more fun. We talked about C-stone.
10. Went to see my mom. I was just gonna stop in.I ended up staying until 5 30 am!!
11. daddy wasnt too happy because i called and no one answered. i figured he was in bed. but really he was waiting up. OOPS!
12. i slept till 2 30 today.
All in all. I laughed a lot. Had loads of fun. I love a life that is drama free!!
now for the countdowns....
6 days till IL.
119 days till C-stone.
oh i found out today that Hot Rod Circuit is going to be in Chicago while i'll be there. So i think i'm gonna go. Maybe i can get some of my future friends (trinity kids) to go too.
and... I bought my C-stone ticket friday. I dont remember if i put that in the last one. WORD TO YOUR MOTHER!!
i'm happy with life.
1. late to sleep early to rise. I got up at 7 30 to babysit.
2. The kids were better.
3. Birthday parties to attend (the kids i mean). Chick-fil-A, bath and body works, Petco (it's where the pets go).
4. She got home at 5 30. NICE!!
5. Home for a bit. It was nice to stop in and chill for a bit.
6. Na's play!!!! it was great!! from 7 30-10 30 though. I fell asleep twice. Not while she was on stage though. of course!
7. the door. I got crap for being so late. I didnt work at all!! I didnt even help clean up!!! It felt good to let someone else take charge for once.
8. Metro Diner, yet again. Ryan says you are cool if you go 2 nights in a row, and we all know i'll do anything to be COOL!!
9. Olivia went which made it that much more fun. We talked about C-stone.
10. Went to see my mom. I was just gonna stop in.I ended up staying until 5 30 am!!
11. daddy wasnt too happy because i called and no one answered. i figured he was in bed. but really he was waiting up. OOPS!
12. i slept till 2 30 today.
All in all. I laughed a lot. Had loads of fun. I love a life that is drama free!!
now for the countdowns....
6 days till IL.
119 days till C-stone.
oh i found out today that Hot Rod Circuit is going to be in Chicago while i'll be there. So i think i'm gonna go. Maybe i can get some of my future friends (trinity kids) to go too.
and... I bought my C-stone ticket friday. I dont remember if i put that in the last one. WORD TO YOUR MOTHER!!
i'm happy with life.
man last time i wrote was friday but to me it was thursday so we'll have to go back a few days. HERE WE GO.....(jumps into the past)
Friday
1. I woke up at 6 30 after going to bed at around 200 i believe
2. I babysat the cutest baby girl and the funniest 6 year old.
3. weighed the consequences of sleeping on the couch while the baby was taking a nap or going to class.
4. I didnt go to class.
5. Picked Naomi up from school. We chilled for a bit. which was fabulous because i hadnt seen her in a while.
6. met up with Leia to pay her for the plane ticket we bought and used over a month ago.
7. attempted to go see Oklahoma at na's school but it was too crowed and i only had 9 bucks. it was 10.
8. went to the diggity door.
9. we made 11 dollars total!! (we were slow.com)
10. meredith made 9 bucks in tips!!! i couldnt believe it. it's probably because she's so good lookin.
11. me, joel, josh, and aaron went to Metro Diner.
12. Ryan was there with paige and some other kids i dont know.
13. fun was had by all!! Joel cracks me up. He is so crass sometimes. I love it!!
14. 1 40: Leia calls me. we talk. i cant believe she is still up! she's comin around. haha (i love you leia)
15. OH!! i completely forgot! it is official...I am the fooseball champion of the Universe!!
that's right!!!! I beat Erik, Mellissa, and AJ. I didnt beat Joel but he doesnt count because to be Fooseball champion you have to
be under 22. :)
16. 3 00am=tired!!!
we'll make a whole new entry for saturday. i think i'm being boring. but when I am gone from here i will be able to read all that i did on the weekends and remember all the fun I had in the BIG D!!!
Friday
1. I woke up at 6 30 after going to bed at around 200 i believe
2. I babysat the cutest baby girl and the funniest 6 year old.
3. weighed the consequences of sleeping on the couch while the baby was taking a nap or going to class.
4. I didnt go to class.
5. Picked Naomi up from school. We chilled for a bit. which was fabulous because i hadnt seen her in a while.
6. met up with Leia to pay her for the plane ticket we bought and used over a month ago.
7. attempted to go see Oklahoma at na's school but it was too crowed and i only had 9 bucks. it was 10.
8. went to the diggity door.
9. we made 11 dollars total!! (we were slow.com)
10. meredith made 9 bucks in tips!!! i couldnt believe it. it's probably because she's so good lookin.
11. me, joel, josh, and aaron went to Metro Diner.
12. Ryan was there with paige and some other kids i dont know.
13. fun was had by all!! Joel cracks me up. He is so crass sometimes. I love it!!
14. 1 40: Leia calls me. we talk. i cant believe she is still up! she's comin around. haha (i love you leia)
15. OH!! i completely forgot! it is official...I am the fooseball champion of the Universe!!
that's right!!!! I beat Erik, Mellissa, and AJ. I didnt beat Joel but he doesnt count because to be Fooseball champion you have to
be under 22. :)
16. 3 00am=tired!!!
we'll make a whole new entry for saturday. i think i'm being boring. but when I am gone from here i will be able to read all that i did on the weekends and remember all the fun I had in the BIG D!!!
ok i really should be in bed but it was just calling my name..... "aimee write in me or you wont be able to sleepp........."
ok so I gave in. Kinda like paul and the donuts.
Ben Kweller was awesome. Weirder than i thought he would be but wonderful to say the least. I rocked it out!!
am radio.....
i dont think they even deserve me to put their name on here. am radio=hurt my ears and make me wanna cry
dang it i forgot the 2nd bands name!! they were so good! CRAP!! hold on i'll find out....
ok i found out it's... centro-matic. and they rocked the house!!! it's really too bad i didnt get to enjoy them as much as i would have liked. there was this jerky high school girl in front of me that kept touching me with her butt! I almost punched her. seriously i was close.
so yeah they were good. i'm gonna look them up and see if they have a cd and prolly burn it. hehehe i'm not ashamed
sarah hicks is a super cool chick!! we are like this (pinky's together)!!! :)
we talked about cornerstone and now i'm super excited!! maybe i'll put a countdown for that on here. I'm buying my ticket tomorrow!! YES!!
oh dee dee (since i know you read this everyday) you have to go with me this year. you will get to know some rockin music! plus it's like the coolest place on the planet! CENTRAL ILLINIOS BABY!!!!
ok that's all it's late and i have to be up at 6 30 YUCKY!!
oh yeah tomorrow OKLAHOMA!!! and i'm picking my na up from school! i'm so excited. it's been almost 2 weeks since i've seen her. what's the world coming too? i'm not sure at all.......
i'm in love with my life........i seriously think i'm living a dream right now.....
ok so I gave in. Kinda like paul and the donuts.
Ben Kweller was awesome. Weirder than i thought he would be but wonderful to say the least. I rocked it out!!
am radio.....
i dont think they even deserve me to put their name on here. am radio=hurt my ears and make me wanna cry
dang it i forgot the 2nd bands name!! they were so good! CRAP!! hold on i'll find out....
ok i found out it's... centro-matic. and they rocked the house!!! it's really too bad i didnt get to enjoy them as much as i would have liked. there was this jerky high school girl in front of me that kept touching me with her butt! I almost punched her. seriously i was close.
so yeah they were good. i'm gonna look them up and see if they have a cd and prolly burn it. hehehe i'm not ashamed
sarah hicks is a super cool chick!! we are like this (pinky's together)!!! :)
we talked about cornerstone and now i'm super excited!! maybe i'll put a countdown for that on here. I'm buying my ticket tomorrow!! YES!!
oh dee dee (since i know you read this everyday) you have to go with me this year. you will get to know some rockin music! plus it's like the coolest place on the planet! CENTRAL ILLINIOS BABY!!!!
ok that's all it's late and i have to be up at 6 30 YUCKY!!
oh yeah tomorrow OKLAHOMA!!! and i'm picking my na up from school! i'm so excited. it's been almost 2 weeks since i've seen her. what's the world coming too? i'm not sure at all.......
i'm in love with my life........i seriously think i'm living a dream right now.....
today was the first time I left my house in about 2 days. I was glad to get out. so here goes the list. it's working for me.
1.church:fun times. it was game night because of all the ice. however all the normal people showed up so we coulda talked about God but we didnt. we played fun games.
2. Zach and Demario=fun.COM!
3. Dee Dee Bell is moving back!!!!! I'm glad for her. she'll be happier and happier ='s healthier. and so what if you are partly doing it for your boyfriend! it's ok!!!
4. Paul is funny too. all i gotta say is DONUTS!!
5. Ben Kweller is tomorrow and I have a plethera (sp?) of people to go with now. man God's the coolest.
6. i've decided to let the world know how funny Paul is so here it is.....
SoxFan3 john and i did donuts in the parking lot this morning
DeeDee1784 at work?
SoxFan3 : there were no cars and lots of ice, it was calling us ... "do donuts, do donuts" that's when i said in an erry voice "do donuts"
SoxFan3 but now it says, "dsafo daonafuts" because its melting
7. i hope you all laugh as much as i did! (well maybe you will only laugh if you are me and dee dee. who knows)
8. so without much to say i'll say.....
9. me and dee dee laughed it up today!! yeah she lives 6 hours away but makes me laugh so hard i wanna pee!!!!
10. oh yeah and i sent her and paul a half eaten breakfast burrito today. FUNNY.COM!!!
11. stronbad of homestarunner.com is going to be my husband!!! someday!!!
12. I DONT i repeat I DONT want paul's smelly breathe on my blog so if you havent brushed your teeth DO IT NOW!! :)
13. Chi-town is closer than it appears. kinda like a side mirror on my rad mustang.
14. I'm gonna miss that 'stang when i'm gone.
15. oh oh oh i almost forgot something important while i was goofing around in here...
16. me and lauren made up.
17. it's a good feeling haveing all your ducks in a row (as they say). She's moving maybe. which is cool. i think.
18. I have a smile on my face 75% of the day lately. It's wonderful!!!
19. BEN KWELLLER!!!!
20. OKLAHOMA!! that's for naomi. she's in the play. i'm going to see it Friday. She gets to wear a corset (i think) really that's the only reason i'm going. hehehe
21. i'm just blabbing now.
22. Friday the door
23. Saturday (march 1) The Door x 2!!!
I love me!!! hahah and dee dee of course.
i wonder how many times her name is in the blog. dee dee you count and tell me k? I LOVE DEE DEE!!
deedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedee
haha count that SKANK!! :)
1.church:fun times. it was game night because of all the ice. however all the normal people showed up so we coulda talked about God but we didnt. we played fun games.
2. Zach and Demario=fun.COM!
3. Dee Dee Bell is moving back!!!!! I'm glad for her. she'll be happier and happier ='s healthier. and so what if you are partly doing it for your boyfriend! it's ok!!!
4. Paul is funny too. all i gotta say is DONUTS!!
5. Ben Kweller is tomorrow and I have a plethera (sp?) of people to go with now. man God's the coolest.
6. i've decided to let the world know how funny Paul is so here it is.....
SoxFan3 john and i did donuts in the parking lot this morning
DeeDee1784 at work?
SoxFan3 : there were no cars and lots of ice, it was calling us ... "do donuts, do donuts" that's when i said in an erry voice "do donuts"
SoxFan3 but now it says, "dsafo daonafuts" because its melting
7. i hope you all laugh as much as i did! (well maybe you will only laugh if you are me and dee dee. who knows)
8. so without much to say i'll say.....
9. me and dee dee laughed it up today!! yeah she lives 6 hours away but makes me laugh so hard i wanna pee!!!!
10. oh yeah and i sent her and paul a half eaten breakfast burrito today. FUNNY.COM!!!
11. stronbad of homestarunner.com is going to be my husband!!! someday!!!
12. I DONT i repeat I DONT want paul's smelly breathe on my blog so if you havent brushed your teeth DO IT NOW!! :)
13. Chi-town is closer than it appears. kinda like a side mirror on my rad mustang.
14. I'm gonna miss that 'stang when i'm gone.
15. oh oh oh i almost forgot something important while i was goofing around in here...
16. me and lauren made up.
17. it's a good feeling haveing all your ducks in a row (as they say). She's moving maybe. which is cool. i think.
18. I have a smile on my face 75% of the day lately. It's wonderful!!!
19. BEN KWELLLER!!!!
20. OKLAHOMA!! that's for naomi. she's in the play. i'm going to see it Friday. She gets to wear a corset (i think) really that's the only reason i'm going. hehehe
21. i'm just blabbing now.
22. Friday the door
23. Saturday (march 1) The Door x 2!!!
I love me!!! hahah and dee dee of course.
i wonder how many times her name is in the blog. dee dee you count and tell me k? I LOVE DEE DEE!!
deedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedeedee
haha count that SKANK!! :)
ok it's been a while. this'll be a longy.
1. saturday night was fun. aaron, tito, josh and i went and ate at denny's at 1am. it was weird because i was the only girl. they made gross boy jokes. (not tito, he is a nice boy)
2. sunday: the door again. (that means i was there friday, saturday and sunday!!)
3. by the tree=wonderful show! and you all know how much i hate shows :)
4. church on sunday was a blast! dee dee and i went head to head in bowling. I won of course!!! :)
5. demario, yet agian is the funniest guy i know.
6. 2 days till Ben Kweller and someone to go with.
7. we are going to see him at Good Records first. that'll be fun.
8. 10 days till Illinios.
9. I talked to my grandpa today. his 70th birthday was yesterday. He's happy and healthy.
10. I was thinking today about Chicago and i'm more nervous then i let on to be. I will have to make new friends and stuff. It's weird.
11. Dee Dee told me she's coming for Thanksgiving (far away i know) and that made me so happy. I almost cried!
12. Fine China is playing again.
13. ICE!! that's all i'm gonna say about that.....
14. i'm ready to get out of my house and have some fun. i miss my car.
nothin else really to talk about. maybe i'll get inspired later. hah yeah right!
1. saturday night was fun. aaron, tito, josh and i went and ate at denny's at 1am. it was weird because i was the only girl. they made gross boy jokes. (not tito, he is a nice boy)
2. sunday: the door again. (that means i was there friday, saturday and sunday!!)
3. by the tree=wonderful show! and you all know how much i hate shows :)
4. church on sunday was a blast! dee dee and i went head to head in bowling. I won of course!!! :)
5. demario, yet agian is the funniest guy i know.
6. 2 days till Ben Kweller and someone to go with.
7. we are going to see him at Good Records first. that'll be fun.
8. 10 days till Illinios.
9. I talked to my grandpa today. his 70th birthday was yesterday. He's happy and healthy.
10. I was thinking today about Chicago and i'm more nervous then i let on to be. I will have to make new friends and stuff. It's weird.
11. Dee Dee told me she's coming for Thanksgiving (far away i know) and that made me so happy. I almost cried!
12. Fine China is playing again.
13. ICE!! that's all i'm gonna say about that.....
14. i'm ready to get out of my house and have some fun. i miss my car.
nothin else really to talk about. maybe i'll get inspired later. hah yeah right!
I just read my blog, and i really sound psycho! on the 20th i said "i think i'm in love with my life". then the very next day i said "please get me out of here!" hmmm
what do we think about this? I think i wasnt being honest with myself. but now i am and you can take me at my word. i honestly do LOVE MY LIFE!!
i thought i would clear that up.
(does it annoy anyone else when i dont capitalize my "i"s?) it annoys me.
what do we think about this? I think i wasnt being honest with myself. but now i am and you can take me at my word. i honestly do LOVE MY LIFE!!
i thought i would clear that up.
(does it annoy anyone else when i dont capitalize my "i"s?) it annoys me.
1. 5 days till Ben Kweller and still no one to go with
2. 13 days till Illinios and the nervousness is killing me
3. Dee Dee's in town and that makes me happier than anyone knows
4. The Door has to be the coolest place on the planet!
5. Michael's mom called today and woke me up. It made me smile.
6. Fine China is playing and that makes me nostaligic. (prom)
7. it's 2:45 and 62 degrees.
8. I'm gonna dye my hair soon. (i'm thinking an almost blonde color. mom says "go lighter i think it would look nice") we all know mom's know best!
9. My life is more beautiful than I know.
10. Ihop at 1 am can be the best experience.
11. why does demario sains make me laugh so hard!?!?!
12. I'm thinking about letting other people (special people) post here. we'll see what happens
13. I really should think more about school. It feels like I've fallen behind but i dont think i have really. (?)
14. Lara called me yesterday. She's staying in "the cult" for another year. I'm not sure what i think about that. She's happy though.
I like the list thing. it makes my life feel more orderly. Everyone needs some order in their lives.
Until next time.
2:51 and 63 degrees and the sun is shining=life is WONDERFUL!!!!!
2. 13 days till Illinios and the nervousness is killing me
3. Dee Dee's in town and that makes me happier than anyone knows
4. The Door has to be the coolest place on the planet!
5. Michael's mom called today and woke me up. It made me smile.
6. Fine China is playing and that makes me nostaligic. (prom)
7. it's 2:45 and 62 degrees.
8. I'm gonna dye my hair soon. (i'm thinking an almost blonde color. mom says "go lighter i think it would look nice") we all know mom's know best!
9. My life is more beautiful than I know.
10. Ihop at 1 am can be the best experience.
11. why does demario sains make me laugh so hard!?!?!
12. I'm thinking about letting other people (special people) post here. we'll see what happens
13. I really should think more about school. It feels like I've fallen behind but i dont think i have really. (?)
14. Lara called me yesterday. She's staying in "the cult" for another year. I'm not sure what i think about that. She's happy though.
I like the list thing. it makes my life feel more orderly. Everyone needs some order in their lives.
Until next time.
2:51 and 63 degrees and the sun is shining=life is WONDERFUL!!!!!
"I dont see why i dont see what bothers me
I dont know why i dont wont let me be
I should have listened to myself when i had a doubt
This dose of my own medicine is too big to swallow now
this is the time when i find
what's inside of me
this is the time when i decide
what i believe
If I wanna be real is this world I have to realize
if Im gonna live by the sword
then I'm gonna have to die by the sword
It's easy to be calm when there'ss no crashing tide
It's easy to be quite when it's loud outside
It's easy to be humble when you're glorified
now I'm out here on my own and screaming from inside
this is the time when I find
what's inside of me
this is the time when I decide
what I believe
if I'm wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword
then I'm gonna have to die by the sword
but you stripped me down to basics
you left my heart exposed
there is no pride in times like this
no one said it was easy
and no one said it was fair
but no one is happy when it is....
I need your loving arms to carry me
when I look in the mirror and I dont like what I see
I know you know what I decided to do
so help me follow even when it's not easy to
if I wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword then I'm gonna have to die
if I wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword then I'm gonna have to die
i'm gonna have to die
i'm gonna die....by the... sword."
-Jill Philips
I know i hate when people post song lyrics too but this song is me right now. It is awesome. So read them. it might just change your life like it has mine.
Today was a wonderful day although it's been raining all day. I got up early and babysat. Then i went and worked out. Man, does that make you feel good! I didnt want to go but i forced myself and now i feel like i can conqure anything. hehehe :)
Well it's time to hit the shower and head out to The Door to see all my lovely friends. Tonight will be fun.
I dont know why i dont wont let me be
I should have listened to myself when i had a doubt
This dose of my own medicine is too big to swallow now
this is the time when i find
what's inside of me
this is the time when i decide
what i believe
If I wanna be real is this world I have to realize
if Im gonna live by the sword
then I'm gonna have to die by the sword
It's easy to be calm when there'ss no crashing tide
It's easy to be quite when it's loud outside
It's easy to be humble when you're glorified
now I'm out here on my own and screaming from inside
this is the time when I find
what's inside of me
this is the time when I decide
what I believe
if I'm wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword
then I'm gonna have to die by the sword
but you stripped me down to basics
you left my heart exposed
there is no pride in times like this
no one said it was easy
and no one said it was fair
but no one is happy when it is....
I need your loving arms to carry me
when I look in the mirror and I dont like what I see
I know you know what I decided to do
so help me follow even when it's not easy to
if I wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword then I'm gonna have to die
if I wanna be real is this world then I have to realize
if I'm gonna live by the sword then I'm gonna have to die
i'm gonna have to die
i'm gonna die....by the... sword."
-Jill Philips
I know i hate when people post song lyrics too but this song is me right now. It is awesome. So read them. it might just change your life like it has mine.
Today was a wonderful day although it's been raining all day. I got up early and babysat. Then i went and worked out. Man, does that make you feel good! I didnt want to go but i forced myself and now i feel like i can conqure anything. hehehe :)
Well it's time to hit the shower and head out to The Door to see all my lovely friends. Tonight will be fun.
please get me out of here!!
I hate this place!! i need out! I need to start my life over. Why do things have to change so quickly. It's been 3 weeks since michael left and my life has fallen apart. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!!!??!?
why do i do this to myself. i knew it would happen again. i freaking knew it!!! forget him!! i'm done!!
I hate myself for doing this! why do i place my trust in things?
I need to get my feet back on the ground again. I need to realize that i do have wonderful friends that truly love me for me!! That i am a smart girl that knows what she needs and doesnt need. I have goals for my life that I WILL accomplish and i will be a successful person with a beautiful husband and beautiful kids!!
So many people love me and i have let them all down in a matter of weeks. I cant believe myself!
I feel like a terrible friend, daughter, sister, PERSON!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God, i need you! I know you see me and all my brokeness and i need you like never before. I want to be the person i was before. How did this happen to me? how did i let you slip away from me so easily when you are the only one that has ever truly loved me? I want you back. I want you to hold me like you used to and speak to me like you used to. I've fallen, but pick me up and put me back together even more perfectly than before. Mold me into the person you want. Wash me clean because i am so dirty. Keep me holy GOD! Show me that all i need is you. even through it all i never stopped thinking about you. I knew you saw me and were disappointed, I loved you even then. I did!! I knew i needed you then because what's a life without a God that loves you more than you will ever know? there isnt one. It leads to death. I wont die here like this! I cant! I know better! I know what love is. My friends and family love me like you do! I dont need to be this person to feel "love". I have love all around me! Thanks for loveing me even when i hate you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ok i'm done being this person! tomorrow i'm gonna get up and be who i know I am!!
thanks to all of you who saw me stumble and let me so that i would learn my lesson. I have!
I love you all, more than you will ever know!
what a relief. I wondered if i'd ever get away from me. I have. Its nice to know that you have conquered something that has plauged you for so long. It's gonna be a long journey but i have crossed many mountains and i can sure cross this one!!
I'm going to bed and i'm going to sleep like a baby because God is going to be with me for the first time in a long time.
I hate this place!! i need out! I need to start my life over. Why do things have to change so quickly. It's been 3 weeks since michael left and my life has fallen apart. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!!!??!?
why do i do this to myself. i knew it would happen again. i freaking knew it!!! forget him!! i'm done!!
I hate myself for doing this! why do i place my trust in things?
I need to get my feet back on the ground again. I need to realize that i do have wonderful friends that truly love me for me!! That i am a smart girl that knows what she needs and doesnt need. I have goals for my life that I WILL accomplish and i will be a successful person with a beautiful husband and beautiful kids!!
So many people love me and i have let them all down in a matter of weeks. I cant believe myself!
I feel like a terrible friend, daughter, sister, PERSON!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God, i need you! I know you see me and all my brokeness and i need you like never before. I want to be the person i was before. How did this happen to me? how did i let you slip away from me so easily when you are the only one that has ever truly loved me? I want you back. I want you to hold me like you used to and speak to me like you used to. I've fallen, but pick me up and put me back together even more perfectly than before. Mold me into the person you want. Wash me clean because i am so dirty. Keep me holy GOD! Show me that all i need is you. even through it all i never stopped thinking about you. I knew you saw me and were disappointed, I loved you even then. I did!! I knew i needed you then because what's a life without a God that loves you more than you will ever know? there isnt one. It leads to death. I wont die here like this! I cant! I know better! I know what love is. My friends and family love me like you do! I dont need to be this person to feel "love". I have love all around me! Thanks for loveing me even when i hate you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
ok i'm done being this person! tomorrow i'm gonna get up and be who i know I am!!
thanks to all of you who saw me stumble and let me so that i would learn my lesson. I have!
I love you all, more than you will ever know!
what a relief. I wondered if i'd ever get away from me. I have. Its nice to know that you have conquered something that has plauged you for so long. It's gonna be a long journey but i have crossed many mountains and i can sure cross this one!!
I'm going to bed and i'm going to sleep like a baby because God is going to be with me for the first time in a long time.
so much is going on in my life i dont really want to talk about it all.
Things are good. Tomorrow's friday which makes it even better.
I'm ready for Spring Break. only 2 weeks from saturday and i get to go to Illinios for a whole week! it's gonna be super fun.
"it's easy to be humble when you are being glorified" TRUE!!!
I think i'm in love with my life.
Things are good. Tomorrow's friday which makes it even better.
I'm ready for Spring Break. only 2 weeks from saturday and i get to go to Illinios for a whole week! it's gonna be super fun.
"it's easy to be humble when you are being glorified" TRUE!!!
I think i'm in love with my life.
today was silly!! I drove freakin 50 miles!!! I had to drive out to Lewisville to volunteer, but i left my stupid papers at home! DANG IT!! but i'm really excited about volunteering there. The lady (Brandi) is really nice, and the place is freakin HUGE!
Michael B. called me tonight and asked me out to dinner. We went and ate at souper salad. it was nice. He makes me feel good. WHY!!! I really shouldnt hang out with him. I really shouldnt do a lot of things i guess. What are ya gonna do!?
I guess i really dont have much to talk about tonight.
Although, talking to Brandi today about all that i do i am starting to realize that i really spread myself thin. I really should stop. Mom told me today i should mentor katie in my free time. I laughed and said "what free time mom!" CRAZY!! just cuz i dont have a "real" job doesnt mean i have a crap load of free time. anyway....
my mind is full of sillyness. I need to get it full of smart things that will help me grow. Like milk! i guess.... :)
i'm ready for this weekend already. Dee Dee is coming home and i'm really excited about that. I miss her when she's gone. Maybe when she's here she'll slap some sense into me and i'll stop what im doing. that would be great!! we'll see!
deed's i love you!!!!
oh yeah...HAPPY BIRTHDAY S-DAWG!!!! I hope your day was wonderful. I sent you an e-card but dee dee told me it was hotmail when really it was yahoo. FOOL! so you didnt get it. someone else did. hehehe maybe i'll send it again. MAYBE IF YOU'RE LUCKY!!! haha
ok that's all i have i think. mabye if i get deep later i'll write again.
Peace!! (seriously we need it)
Michael B. called me tonight and asked me out to dinner. We went and ate at souper salad. it was nice. He makes me feel good. WHY!!! I really shouldnt hang out with him. I really shouldnt do a lot of things i guess. What are ya gonna do!?
I guess i really dont have much to talk about tonight.
Although, talking to Brandi today about all that i do i am starting to realize that i really spread myself thin. I really should stop. Mom told me today i should mentor katie in my free time. I laughed and said "what free time mom!" CRAZY!! just cuz i dont have a "real" job doesnt mean i have a crap load of free time. anyway....
my mind is full of sillyness. I need to get it full of smart things that will help me grow. Like milk! i guess.... :)
i'm ready for this weekend already. Dee Dee is coming home and i'm really excited about that. I miss her when she's gone. Maybe when she's here she'll slap some sense into me and i'll stop what im doing. that would be great!! we'll see!
deed's i love you!!!!
oh yeah...HAPPY BIRTHDAY S-DAWG!!!! I hope your day was wonderful. I sent you an e-card but dee dee told me it was hotmail when really it was yahoo. FOOL! so you didnt get it. someone else did. hehehe maybe i'll send it again. MAYBE IF YOU'RE LUCKY!!! haha
ok that's all i have i think. mabye if i get deep later i'll write again.
Peace!! (seriously we need it)
this weekend was awesome!! i love the kids at the door. we are starting to become like a family.man i hate it when people say that, but it's true. Valentine's day was nice. Lots of cool people. Russell David Hobbes kissed me on the cheek. It was really nice.
I feel like sometimes i hide behind the people at the door to make myself feel more like i want "me" to be. Yeah, i'm starting to hate the person i'm becoming. I go there (the door) and am the person i used to/want to be. I find myself wishing it were friday everyday so that i could be around my real friends.
i am hating collin county more and more. I think because i know that Trinity is fast approaching and i'm stoked (i'm gonna say that more often!) about it. I'm ready to get on with my life. I think it's because i know that i'll meet my husband there and start my life and that makes me really happy.
naomi makes me really happy too. It's nice to have a friend that you see eye to eye with and be completely honest with. Tonight was nice.
i hate trying to examine myself. for me it's hard not to though.
Tomorrow i'm gonna be the person that i know i am. I'm not going to do anything stupid.
my parents bought the plane tickets to Chicago, so it's final. i'm going to visit and see what the college is all about. FINALLY!!
i got the housing application in the mail on friday. I cant believe it's so soon. I dont have any money, but i know it's where i'm supossed to be. So....."Chicago, here i come!!!" hehehehe
ok enough.
I feel like sometimes i hide behind the people at the door to make myself feel more like i want "me" to be. Yeah, i'm starting to hate the person i'm becoming. I go there (the door) and am the person i used to/want to be. I find myself wishing it were friday everyday so that i could be around my real friends.
i am hating collin county more and more. I think because i know that Trinity is fast approaching and i'm stoked (i'm gonna say that more often!) about it. I'm ready to get on with my life. I think it's because i know that i'll meet my husband there and start my life and that makes me really happy.
naomi makes me really happy too. It's nice to have a friend that you see eye to eye with and be completely honest with. Tonight was nice.
i hate trying to examine myself. for me it's hard not to though.
Tomorrow i'm gonna be the person that i know i am. I'm not going to do anything stupid.
my parents bought the plane tickets to Chicago, so it's final. i'm going to visit and see what the college is all about. FINALLY!!
i got the housing application in the mail on friday. I cant believe it's so soon. I dont have any money, but i know it's where i'm supossed to be. So....."Chicago, here i come!!!" hehehehe
ok enough.
not much to say today. the high today was 65 and rainy.
Leia came over this morning it was really nice to see her. We went to school together but she parked in another parking lot so i didnt get to say bye. (Leia, i hope you had a good day.)
Psychology was nice. I got my test back and got a 72. i was ok with that, i knew it wouldnt be that great since i didnt study, but she gave everyone a curve and so i ended up with a 90. That was super cool!! I'm sad in that class though, because i wish i had friends in there but i dont think anyone likes me because i'm so quite. oh well. i know i'm cool! hehehe
I went shopping today because I felt like it and i bought a cool king of kings shirt. it's the one i wanted for christmas. It was on sale too. sales=RAD. I saw laurie there (she's in my spanish class) i really like her. we get along great. hopefully sometime we can hang out outside of class or something. Then i went to Old Navy and bought some flip flops since it's been so warm.
I wish i wasnt home right now. I might call naomi soon.
tomorrow's valentine's day! i'm pretty excited actually because we are gonna have some fun at The Door.
no more to talk about.
Leia came over this morning it was really nice to see her. We went to school together but she parked in another parking lot so i didnt get to say bye. (Leia, i hope you had a good day.)
Psychology was nice. I got my test back and got a 72. i was ok with that, i knew it wouldnt be that great since i didnt study, but she gave everyone a curve and so i ended up with a 90. That was super cool!! I'm sad in that class though, because i wish i had friends in there but i dont think anyone likes me because i'm so quite. oh well. i know i'm cool! hehehe
I went shopping today because I felt like it and i bought a cool king of kings shirt. it's the one i wanted for christmas. It was on sale too. sales=RAD. I saw laurie there (she's in my spanish class) i really like her. we get along great. hopefully sometime we can hang out outside of class or something. Then i went to Old Navy and bought some flip flops since it's been so warm.
I wish i wasnt home right now. I might call naomi soon.
tomorrow's valentine's day! i'm pretty excited actually because we are gonna have some fun at The Door.
no more to talk about.
Today........
1. shower.
2. school.
3. eat.
4. waste 45 min. (never to be seen again)
5. school.
6. sleep on the couch=life is good.
7. rant about war.
8. church=fun new friends.
9. home.
10. sit in front of the computer for a couple hours wasting away.
that's pretty much it. i laughed a lot today. thanks to Dee Dee Bell. she's so nice to me. I love her tons.
I MISS YOU DEEDER BEEDER!!!!
that's all.
wait.....
D-MO SUCKS!!!! :) (that's for you dee dee)
1. shower.
2. school.
3. eat.
4. waste 45 min. (never to be seen again)
5. school.
6. sleep on the couch=life is good.
7. rant about war.
8. church=fun new friends.
9. home.
10. sit in front of the computer for a couple hours wasting away.
that's pretty much it. i laughed a lot today. thanks to Dee Dee Bell. she's so nice to me. I love her tons.
I MISS YOU DEEDER BEEDER!!!!
that's all.
wait.....
D-MO SUCKS!!!! :) (that's for you dee dee)
well since i had such a long entry yesterday i'm gonna make this one sorta short. but who knows i might write agian later tonight.
So today i realized i HATE the media! The news to be exact. i was watching tonight to further my intelligence but all it did was piss me off! the first thing to come up "war watch: complete coverage". Then what you need to do to "prepare" for war. Then a blurb about the army navy stores NOT selling any gas masks. but they did it so we would think all kinds of people are going out and buying them. when really the guy said no one had bought one in a while. Then the lady comes back and says "visit the web at ...... to see what else YOU need to do to be prepared for war". I couldnt stand it anymore so i YELLED at the TV and said "NOTHING YOU DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING DAMNIT!!!" then a commercial break but before we do that let's put more fear into America and have 3 points about the war here they are in no particular order.....
1. codes on tape of Bin Laden.
2. NATO deadlock
3. more troops called up to duty. (that makes it 150,000 young men and women now)
"more complete coverage of "war watch" when we return. go to wfaa.com for coverage 24 hours a day" so you can be scared for you life ALL THE FREAKIN TIME!!!!!!
i'm just wanna live my life. that's all i want. i dont need a gas mask to do that do i?? i dont think i do.
well time to go to church to learn about the FEAR OF GOD!!!!
have fun. all this makes me wish i were a hippy!
So today i realized i HATE the media! The news to be exact. i was watching tonight to further my intelligence but all it did was piss me off! the first thing to come up "war watch: complete coverage". Then what you need to do to "prepare" for war. Then a blurb about the army navy stores NOT selling any gas masks. but they did it so we would think all kinds of people are going out and buying them. when really the guy said no one had bought one in a while. Then the lady comes back and says "visit the web at ...... to see what else YOU need to do to be prepared for war". I couldnt stand it anymore so i YELLED at the TV and said "NOTHING YOU DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING DAMNIT!!!" then a commercial break but before we do that let's put more fear into America and have 3 points about the war here they are in no particular order.....
1. codes on tape of Bin Laden.
2. NATO deadlock
3. more troops called up to duty. (that makes it 150,000 young men and women now)
"more complete coverage of "war watch" when we return. go to wfaa.com for coverage 24 hours a day" so you can be scared for you life ALL THE FREAKIN TIME!!!!!!
i'm just wanna live my life. that's all i want. i dont need a gas mask to do that do i?? i dont think i do.
well time to go to church to learn about the FEAR OF GOD!!!!
have fun. all this makes me wish i were a hippy!
why do they even have to tell us all this? is it so that we will run for cover, or so that we look at all arabians living in America with caution? I'm really not sure.
so the music thing.... I know i do it. i listen to a song and sometimes i wish i were the person the singer is singing too. or in the car i'll turn my music up really loud so that i cant think straight. So that i dont have to think. So i work at a club and i'm surrounded by people that eat/sleep/drink music all weekend. I see these people and i wonder if they ever live in reality. Music in NOT reality. i think tomorrow i wont turn on my radio in my car and be alone with my thoughts. That's hard to do.
I've been thinking about lauren a lot lately. I feel like i need to write her and tell her how i feel about the whole situation. I'm not sure how to put it in words though. Some way i have to "fix" this "problem". it's starting to eat me alive. You cant have a friendship for 13 years and then just stop talking and stop acting like you care. I'll swallow my pride soon and write her an email. i hope she reads this.
War? I dont think i've dealt with it yet. or what it means. Because me, a 19 year old white middle class girl (i'm still a girl not yet a lady or woman) have no idea what war means or is. I'm afraid of it. I'm afraid because 2 or my really good friends are gone (possibly never to come back) because of it. Yet in my heart i love George Bush. What is a kid to do. Seriously...how am i supposed to act. I know i'm supposed to be completely behind Mr. Bush, but geez it's tearing me up inside!!! I need to deal with it. I need to cry about it. I did once when me and my mom were talking at her work and she said that last week my dad said to her "If i knew that America could use me I would go over there and do whatever i could." wow the thought of my dad leaving. I couldnt deal with it.
speaking of "the folks" (folks being pronounced with a silent L) as of yesterday they have been together for 30 years!! i cant believe it!! It makes me so excited to have parents that love eachother so much. I wish that for myself. mom says "i love him more now than i ever have." WOW!!!
this is turning out to be longer than i had hoped......oh who cares.
I wish i loved my life as much as i tell people i do. sometimes i wish i didnt laugh so much. sometimes i wish i were more serious about serious issues in my life instead of just laughing and shrugging it off. and figuring "oh it'll just go away sometime, just keep going. Life is good." no it isnt...... it's hard really hard.
i hate making decisions about huge things in my life. I'm sure everyone hates it, but i have had to make choices a lot lately. Most havent been good ones. which makes me hate it more. But Chicago is a good one!!
one month left till i get to go there and see what life has in store for me. I hope i get to be all i want to be.
i'm sick of writing in this thing. I feel really vulnerable. I think that's why i'm doing this though.
i'm just gonna come out and say it I hate/love austin!! and that sucks i care too much for him. he cares too little for me. I need to be honest with my parents. I hate that about me right now.
that's all.
to my friends: I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!! more than you will ever know......
I've been thinking about lauren a lot lately. I feel like i need to write her and tell her how i feel about the whole situation. I'm not sure how to put it in words though. Some way i have to "fix" this "problem". it's starting to eat me alive. You cant have a friendship for 13 years and then just stop talking and stop acting like you care. I'll swallow my pride soon and write her an email. i hope she reads this.
War? I dont think i've dealt with it yet. or what it means. Because me, a 19 year old white middle class girl (i'm still a girl not yet a lady or woman) have no idea what war means or is. I'm afraid of it. I'm afraid because 2 or my really good friends are gone (possibly never to come back) because of it. Yet in my heart i love George Bush. What is a kid to do. Seriously...how am i supposed to act. I know i'm supposed to be completely behind Mr. Bush, but geez it's tearing me up inside!!! I need to deal with it. I need to cry about it. I did once when me and my mom were talking at her work and she said that last week my dad said to her "If i knew that America could use me I would go over there and do whatever i could." wow the thought of my dad leaving. I couldnt deal with it.
speaking of "the folks" (folks being pronounced with a silent L) as of yesterday they have been together for 30 years!! i cant believe it!! It makes me so excited to have parents that love eachother so much. I wish that for myself. mom says "i love him more now than i ever have." WOW!!!
this is turning out to be longer than i had hoped......oh who cares.
I wish i loved my life as much as i tell people i do. sometimes i wish i didnt laugh so much. sometimes i wish i were more serious about serious issues in my life instead of just laughing and shrugging it off. and figuring "oh it'll just go away sometime, just keep going. Life is good." no it isnt...... it's hard really hard.
i hate making decisions about huge things in my life. I'm sure everyone hates it, but i have had to make choices a lot lately. Most havent been good ones. which makes me hate it more. But Chicago is a good one!!
one month left till i get to go there and see what life has in store for me. I hope i get to be all i want to be.
i'm sick of writing in this thing. I feel really vulnerable. I think that's why i'm doing this though.
i'm just gonna come out and say it I hate/love austin!! and that sucks i care too much for him. he cares too little for me. I need to be honest with my parents. I hate that about me right now.
that's all.
to my friends: I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!! more than you will ever know......
I think people might use music to cover up what is really going on in their lives. I just thought of that so I will have to think more about it and write more later. but i think it's true. we'll see......
time for school.
You make me hate art!
aimee
time for school.
You make me hate art!
aimee
today was a super good day!! I got up early went to class until 2 30 and then went and worked out with my mom. then i came home and had dinner. That's the nice thing about my dad not having a job. I know that he will have dinner ready at 6 30 every night and usually it's pretty good.
I was supposed to go to class from 630-920 but ended up just picking naomi up from school and hanging out with her. I'm really starting to value me and naomi's friendship more. not that i didnt before but we are starting to get really close and i like that. She helps me a lot.
I am realizing now that i'm 19 that i really have some awesome friends. Lots of people dont get to have one really close friend when i have like 3!! Man, i'm lucky. Life is so good!! I honestly dont know how it could be any better (well maybe i know one thing) but seriously God has totally blessed me.
I talked to my cousin (ashley) tonight. we laughed it up!! I'm so happy that we can get along so well and see eye to eye on so many issues in our family. She is doing so well and it makes me so happy. I get to see her in 3 weeks and I think i'm going to tell her how happy i am for her. She needs someone to tell her that. I have no agenda with her and i'm glad.
I wish i were honest with myself all the time. it would make things a lot easier. (that's all i'm gonna say about that)
it's late (12 06) i should head for bed.
I was supposed to go to class from 630-920 but ended up just picking naomi up from school and hanging out with her. I'm really starting to value me and naomi's friendship more. not that i didnt before but we are starting to get really close and i like that. She helps me a lot.
I am realizing now that i'm 19 that i really have some awesome friends. Lots of people dont get to have one really close friend when i have like 3!! Man, i'm lucky. Life is so good!! I honestly dont know how it could be any better (well maybe i know one thing) but seriously God has totally blessed me.
I talked to my cousin (ashley) tonight. we laughed it up!! I'm so happy that we can get along so well and see eye to eye on so many issues in our family. She is doing so well and it makes me so happy. I get to see her in 3 weeks and I think i'm going to tell her how happy i am for her. She needs someone to tell her that. I have no agenda with her and i'm glad.
I wish i were honest with myself all the time. it would make things a lot easier. (that's all i'm gonna say about that)
it's late (12 06) i should head for bed.
